Monday, April 9, 2012

Male / Female Energetics

At this point in our lives, we are all very well aware that there are males and females and for as long as we can remember, there always have been. There are also those born into one gender that feel they are actually the opposite gender. There is even a tiny portion of the population that have both male and female genitalia. No matter what genitals we posses on the outside, we all have masculine and feminine energies within us.


When most people hear the term “masculine and feminine energies”, they think of outward expressions and mannerisms rather than the underlying energies which generate these outward actions. There is a fine line there so for the purposes of this discussion, let me clarify the differences and define the terms that I’ll be using. I’ll use male/female or man/woman when I am referencing the physical body with the reference being based upon genitalia. I’ll use the terms manly/girly to reference the outward actions which our culture stereotypically assigns to each gender. Finally I’ll use the terms masculine/feminine to reference the core electromagnetic energetics within each of us.

The masculine energy is about outward moving, generative, aggressive, protective, hunter-gather energies. From an electromagnetic standpoint, masculine energy has a positive charge to it. Regardless of our gender, the masculine energies are housed on the right side of the body. The feminine energy is about inward moving, receptive, nurturing, nesting energies. Feminine energy has a negative electromagnetic charge to it. These energies are housed on the left side of our bodies. You can think of these two energetics as polar opposites which balance each other like opposite sides of a magnet. There is enough attraction and repulsion between them that they create a balanced stability within the human body structure.


The manly or girly actions, while not directly related to the core energetics, certainly have their base in the definitions of those energetics. Our culture typically relegates fighting, hunting and aggressive actions to men and so these become “manly” actions. We also tend to associate nest making, child bearing and rearing, passive or softer actions to females and thus they become “girly” actions. The judgments upon these actions as either manly or girly have less to do with the action than they do with our culturally based stereotypes associated with our human need to understand the world around us through pattern matching.

The ability to rapidly define something works to our advantage to help us decide how to respond to it. As such our belief about someone typically forms first from stereotypical norms handed down to us by society and our parents. If the person is male “they should” act in certain ways and in other ways if they are female. When people move outside those norms, the cognitive dissonance between our own internal expected behavior model and their actions is what generates the conflict that we see so prevalently in the world. We typically fear what we don’t understand and we are uncomfortable with difference.


When we get down to the core energetics of masculine and feminine, we see the energies that typically drive the actions associated with the gender based stereotypes. Remember, we all have both of these energetics regardless of gender. These energies are so subtle and yet intimately familiar to us that most of us aren’t even aware that we are using them or that there is even a distinction between. It is when we choose to ignore them or block them that we run into trouble.

Pure masculine energy is about outward moving protective energy. This is energy which moves out to protect us and to gather information on our surroundings and the environment. This energy can be felt easily when we move into new surroundings as part of that initial “what’s going on here and is it safe?” scan of the area that we all do either consciously or unconsciously.

Pure feminine energy is about inward moving receptive energy. This is the energetic part of us that receives information and processes it and contains it. This energy can be felt when we hug someone or comfort them if they are in an emotional state. That feeling of “I’ve got you and am here for you” is the nurturing energetic in action.

Our bodies hold both energetics regardless of our gender and therefore we are constantly utilizing both energies throughout our day and our lives. We may be more or less comfortable with one or the other because of our upbringing or socialization. As we become more comfortable with ourselves and the variety of energetic patterns that we run, we have greater access to these energetics to use to construct our lives in a conscious fashion. Rather than depending upon the opposite gender to handle the actions not directly associated with our birth gender, we learn to be self-sufficient and use our own energies to ensure that our needs are met. We do not need anyone else to “complete” us. We are all complete and whole beings as is. We are social creatures however and our desire to have friends and sexual partners comes from the desire to be a part of the whole rather than to fill a missing piece of ourselves. To believe that we have to have a man to do the manly things or a woman to do the girly things is nothing more than an excuse to remain in victim mode. As long as we exist in victim mode, we’ll never be able to fully claim our own power to consciously create a life that pleases us and meets our needs.


To get conscious use of these core energetics, we have to start with the acceptance of the fact that we have them. From there, we have to learn to make use of them and practice self-care with them. When we deny our ability to harness these energies because of our fear of judgment or even past failures, we cut ourselves off from our true power. Typically we will struggle with the energetics of our opposite gender because our culture doesn’t encourage us to embrace those energies within ourselves. Guys are socialized to be rough and tumble dudes and girls are praised and valued for their beauty and home making skills. Despite that, we each have times where we know that we’ve utilized both energies successfully and grown from the experience in ways that we would never have done by relying on someone else to handle it for us.

Self-care happens and is most nourishing when we utilize both energies and allow them to flow freely. When we consciously do activities which nurture our bodies (massage, meditation, baths, rest, etc.), we honor and empower the inner feminine. This one is obviously easier for women because they are used to pampering themselves more than men. When we honor ourselves by standing up for our needs or boundaries or we exercise to strengthen our bodies, we are honoring the inner masculine. This is something more natural to men because we are taught to fight and challenge others to protect what is ours. As we journey on the road to wholeness within ourselves, we have to learn from others of both genders how to utilize and nourish both energetics more fully. If we only focus on one energetic to the detriment of the other, we give our power away.


In the above information I mentioned that the masculine and feminine energies are housed on opposite sides of the body but there is more to that story than just housing the energies. If you think of a battery for the following discussion it may be a bit easier to relate it to your own body. Let’s use a standard AA battery as an example. When you look at the battery there is the positive end that has the little nipple that sticks out and the negative end which is typically flat or slightly indented. The two ends of the batteries are typically referred to as the poles. Energy flows into the battery through the negative (receptive) pole and out through the positive (generative) and this generates the current. Within the battery, the charge that it is holding is stored down in the battery but the connection to the outer world happens through the poles.

Our bodies function on the electromagnet level in that same way but how that functions depends upon our gender. For all of us, one end of our battery is at that base of our spine down in the pelvic region and the other is not at the top of our head as you might think but rather at our heart center. Our hearts generate a very strong electromagnetic current. For men, our positive pole is at our pelvis and our negative pole is at our heart. For women, it is opposite. Our genitals are a clear expression of that energetic flow. Cocks send out energy and vaginas receive it. Once you become familiar with these energetic poles and their function and you begin using them consciously, life in general will flow more easily for you and you will have a wider range of options available to you in interpersonal interactions. 


A full discussion on the topic of using these energetic centers consciously in our daily interactions would take up a great deal of space here and potentially be too much information to share in this format. For now I will encourage you to take some quiet time and become familiar with these two energetic centers. The best way to learn about anything is to put your full awareness on it consciously and explore it for yourself. In the following paragraphs I will share a simple technique for doing just that.

First, find some alone time and space. To really get an accurate feel for what this exercise does, you need to ensure that no one (not even pets) is in your energetic field (at least 5-8 feet in each direction). Having other beings around you will distort your readings because their system will be responding to yours and yours to theirs.

Begin by getting your Basics (remember that’s all 4 steps not just grounding) in place. Spend some time with this and then get a feel for what it is like when you are calm, centered, balanced and just dealing with your energy. That feeling is the end result of having your Basics fully in place. For the purposes of this exercise, consider this your baseline. Ideally if you have been practicing the Basics since I introduced them to you, you will have been doing that in all situations to a point where it is happening constantly and you are in a balanced and stable place energetically. (If not, I hope you will start sooner rather than later.) This is an important step because in the following exercise you are going to be modifying and manipulating your energy field and so starting from a neutral place is the only way to really be able to track the shift.

Next, put your full awareness into your receptive/negative/feminine center. Close your eyes, go inside and just put all of your thoughts and awareness into that physical location as described above based upon your gender. Hold this awareness for at least 30 seconds and then begin to notice how you feel. Spend some time observing any tingles or sensations that arise within the body. Notice any shifts in mood or even a change in your thoughts or desires. Compare these to your baseline feelings to become consciously aware of how it feels to be fully in the feminine.

When you believe you have a good feel for that, let your thoughts go from that center and move your full awareness into your masculine center. Again, hold your awareness there for at least 30 seconds before you begin observing the feelings. This time compare the sensations, emotions and thoughts to those you had while holding the feminine. Really get a good felt sense for what it is like FOR YOU when you are consciously holding the masculine. We all interpret things differently so let go of what you think it means to be masculine or feminine and simply observe what it feels like for you when you hold these centers. This will be invaluable data for you as you move through life.

Spend some time moving back and forth between these two centers now but remember to hold your focus on each center for about 30 seconds to really get a feel for the experience. 30 seconds will give your subconscious time to pick up the desire from your conscious mind and act on it. Once you have a good feel for the shift that happens from center to center, take some time to balance these centers by splitting your focus and holding both centers at once. This will be a little tricky at first for most people because we aren’t used to observing two places within our bodies at once. Typically we focus on something when it starts hurting or calling for attention in some way. As you are able to focus your thoughts on both centers at once equally you should begin to feel a third set of sensations (the balanced state) which should be compared to what you felt individually at either center. Remember these “feelings” are very, very subtle.

The observation of the sensations at each point in this exercise is as important as any other piece. The more you become aware of how it feels when you are more in one or the other center, the more information you’ll have that will help you know when you are out of balance energetically. Learning to hold an equal balance in these two centers will change the way others relate and respond to you. Experiment with that and see for yourself but just remember that opposite energies attract. The more you consciously hold (and thus charge) your masculine center, the more this will attract the feminine energy in others in your field (or aura) and vice-versa. The more you can hold a balance between these two centers, the more it will attract a balanced interaction with others regardless of gender.


There are a lot of ways that you can use this information in your daily life. The techniques involved in that exceed the scope of this blog however so I won’t discuss them here. I mention this to hopefully inspire you to explore that for yourself and see what your body can teach you. The most important thing that I hope you will take away from this is that holding awareness on these two centers in the balanced state is ideal for daily living. If you find yourself “in your head” too much, overly sexually stimulated or overly emotional, you can believe that you are out of balance between these two centers. The good news is that with just your awareness and intention you can bring them back into balance easily.

What energetics are you magnetically attracting into your life?


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